okay wait signs your sexual chemistry is real actually exist??
Signs your sexual chemistry is real don’t announce themselves. They just smack you in the face while you’re trying to parallel park in Astoria at 1 a.m. He handed me the aux cord without asking. I almost cried. That’s when I knew.
I’m writing this in yesterday’s mascara. My apartment smells like cold sesame noodles. Whatever. Let’s do this.
Sign your sexual chemistry is real #1: you stop acting
I burped. Mid-makeout. Full LaCroix-after-tacos burp. Old me would’ve died. This time I just froze. He laughed so hard he sat on my kitchen floor. Then he burped back. Louder. We didn’t bang for an hour because we couldn’t stop laughing. That’s it. That’s the sign.
Another big one: silence doesn’t freak you out
We were stuck on the Cross Island doing 3 mph. No music. Just blinker clicks. Ten whole minutes. I didn’t panic. I just stared at his thumb on the steering wheel and forgot how to speak. Lust needs noise. Chemistry just hums.
Signs your sexual chemistry is real when you fight and it’s hotter
We screamed because he defended MTA vending machines. I called him a tourist. He called me dramatic. Ten minutes later I’m pinned against my bedroom door. He says “say it again.” I’m already undoing his belt. Yeah. Cooked.
- If you’re mad but still notice their clenched jaw turns you on? Congrats. Real chemistry.
The moment that ended me
I once told him, drunk on a Bushwick fire escape, that tomato leaves smell like safety to me. Three weeks later he sent a 4-second video. Just him crushing a leaf in Jersey. Caption: “thought you’d wanna smell this.” I watched it on loop in the Whole Foods freezer aisle until my phone died. Lust doesn’t do that.
I’m not saying forever. I’m saying when the horny fog lifts and you still care how their childhood dog died? That’s the real shit.
Anyway he just texted “left my hoodie.” I’m about to wear it to bed and sniff the collar like a total creep.
Tell me your “oh shit this is real” moments below. I need company in this clownery.
(quick sources so I don’t sound completely unhinged: Helen Fisher on love chemicals + this study on oxytocin spikes → https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3183515/)
