dark empaths honestly fuck you up worse than any narcissist ever could and i say that as someone who just spent four months letting one live rent-free in my head (and my apartment).
i’m writing this at 1:42 am now because the whataburger got cold and i stress-ate the fries instead. ac still rattling like it’s personally mad at me. whatever.
how i met my personal dark empath (spoiler: worst decision of 2025)
march, pouring rain, thursday. Dark Empaths my roommate dragged me to shangri-la on east 6th after i spent72 hours straight crying over a situationship. this dude just slides up to the bar, orders my exact drink without asking (topo chico + milagro, who does that), locks eyes with me, and basically telegraphs “i already know every secret you’re hiding tonight.” brain chemistry? obliterated. i folded like a lawn chair.
twenty minutes later i spill my entire childhood trauma, the abortion i never told my mom about, the fact i still sleep with the hallway light on. he nods, touches my wrist, absorbs it all like a sponge and somehow makes me feel holy for being broken. i ate that shit up.
the red flags i straight-up ignored because the green flags felt like crack
- he cried when i cried (legit tears rolling down his face)
- he remembered pickles the maltipoo’s exact birthday
- he said “i’ve never felt this seen” on date two
- he built playlists that predicted my emotions better than i could
turns out he just collected data like a creepy little pokémon trainer.
when the mask finally slipped and i wanted to vomit
june, house party in bremond. Dark Empaths i finally ask why he never posts me or introduces me to anyone. he doesn’t yell. he goes quiet, eyes fill with tears, and whispers “i was protecting you from how intense this feels for me.”
i apologized. i actually apologized to him for wanting basic girlfriend treatment. that’s when my brain hit the emergency brake.
the manipulative traits i see crystal-clear now
the “empathy” that’s really just reconnaissance
every time i vented he urged me “tell me everything.” i spilled. he mirrored it perfectly. two weeks later he weaponized that exact insecurity in fights.
the pro-level victim cosplay
anytime i tried to leave he morphed into a wounded little boy, talked about his “abandonment wounds” until i ended up comforting him for hurting me.
spiritual love-bombing on steroids
“you’re my twin flame” “i waited lifetimes for you” while he still swiped on hinge next to me in bed (yeah i saw the notifications, fight me)
detox attempts (currently failing)
i blocked him four separate times. Dark Empaths last week he emailed from a burner with the subject “pickles would want you to read this” and attached a photo of a maltipoo that looked exactly like my dead dog. i caved for twelve entire hours. not proud.
therapy helps on good days. my therapist keeps repeating “empathy without boundaries is manipulation” and i want it tattooed somewhere i can see when i’m dumb at 3am.
if some gorgeous broken person currently “gets you” on a cellular level, run. or don’t. i obviously haven’t. but drop your own dark empath horror stories below so we can all cry-laugh together while i keep ignoring my sink full of dishes. love y’all. kinda.
